Perception, Description, Interpretation: What's Love Got To Do With It?

   They say you can fall in love at first sight. Then there are arranged marriage and although controversial depending on who's looking at it, is more than meets the eyes. There are people out there who have real working meaningful long distance relationships. Relationships that stand the test of time. Relationships that last even when one goes off to war for long long periods of time. Life doesn't stop, they still grow, they still have families. People who work away for months, business trips, and so on. 

   Who says being home 24/7 is the definition of how a real relationship lasts. Communication I've always said was important. Doesn't matter where you are if you can communicate well. Everything else will click into place. You can only feel so connected to someone if your able to be yourself with that person, if you don't make that effort what's love got to do with it? That first reaction when you meet someone is it the only thing that strikes you and gives you that sense of love? Or is it just physical attraction that might be lucky enough to develop without your realizing? Why do people talk at lengths and wind up married? 

   I once talked to someone at a distance then eventually moved to them and on the very same night every meaningful thing happened and it was like a spark that ignited everything we knew we had before but in physical form. To be open with someone, enjoy their company, to be yourself and have something deeper. One thing I've learnt is no matter what you think you know, it's an interpretation of what it is. 

   Everyone has a different definition even if there are areas in which they agree we all decide it's one thing or another. You pick a theory, an action and a cause for what brings meaning to your relationships to help you understand and mainly sleep at night for those with heart ache but the truth is most people aren't really listening when they meet someone. The balance between emotions and attractions tends to make you blind to what's really in front of you. 

Some people are exactly who they are upfront, some are acting, and some have layers. If you don't have open eyes you won't realize til it's too late and it's why so many people wonder why they didn't see it sooner. Relationships are work on purpose. There is no perfect because people aren't perfect. I used to say there was only perfect for someone because we all seek different forms of perfect. The ideal. Here's the thing, if you could have exactly what you wanted what would be left? What to explore what to learn from what to enjoy..really. Coming from nothing you tend to learn these things compared to those who've had everything always. 

   You shouldn't want perfect but you don't want broken either. That middle ground where you connect and through highs and lows you allow yourself to be more complete because if you search yourself you will only be happy for who you are and not the parts you don't have, relationships are indeed a part of you. Friendships, family, lovers. Life is too explore and the answers to seek. Life would be boring by expecting everything your way. Just like a gift you have no idea what it is til you open if, if you bought it yourself it's what you want. The person giving that gift is giving you something you need. So like a relationship that's what should be understood before you dismiss what's right in front of you. People genuinely are scared of the unknown, all thanks to bad decisions, some not even made by them. We are only human. That being said thanks to years of observing my surroundings I can accept and realize some of the biggest mistakes we make. I learnt at a very early age what a manipulative person was and how they do it. This then allowed me to see when someone is trying to do it to me. 

   Thing is in any relationship you tend to seek out what you want and not what they are. It's why so many relationships fail. You see what you want and typically they give you what they want because they see what your projecting and they want to impress. Why can't we just be ourselves first and find out what's best in each other so we can find the right person sooner? The most painful thing I've learnt is when you feel so deeply for someone that can't get past their own insecurities from past neglect that they can't allow themselves to be happy even though they know what's right in front of them and can admit how they feel and still be too afraid to let it happen. It's vicious to the heart and eventually you have to let go. 

   For me I'm on a path to hope to find someone as hopelessly devoted to having real depth and connection that is unbreakable by anyone that can stand the test of time and be all someone needs. I don't need to be needed I want to be needed by someone who wants me as their family. Who will allow me to treat them with the biggest heart and the deepest of care. I don't know if they are out there, but I've got one life and I'm not taking no for an answer, I'm taking my chances because life is too short to be afraid and create barriers that can keep me from being happy. So whether people fall in love at first sight, or over a long period of time, or maybe that best friend you didn't realize was everything you wanted. 

   Love is still worth living and fighting for. I refuse to let love fail. No matter how the world turns. My world is here. My heart is strong and I believe I finally know myself better than I did before and I'm worth it. Everyone in the world should have their chance, you can't give up on life and you can't make excuses to grow into the person you deserve to be. Love just is. Whatever you make it. 

Thanks for reading!